Hopes for Joseph Gordon-Levitt
So quick story time about JGL and his rock hard penis....
Back in the day a girl, let's call her Juli, worked for a talent agency and had the distinct pleasure to escort JGL around NYC for a few hours. She is pretty, okay...she is fucking beautiful, and doesn't get caught up in celebrity startdom which makes her perfect for the job. So of course JGL is going to try and hit that, honestly most guys would try. Only problem is he's only in town for the night and is going to some bullshit promo party for some movie that doesn't matter anymore. Juli takes him around for a bit, gets food and drops him off at a hotel - says, "If you need anything else, just give me a call."
Juli fulfilled her side of the job and went out with friends later. Meanwhile, JGL apparently can't get any play at the bourgeois party or just can't stop thinking about Juli.
Flash forward to 2am the texting starts. (emulation)
Joe: Hey, how's it going?
Juli: Great, just getting home. How was that thing
Joe: Cool Cool, kind of a bust... Just hanging out in my hotel room
Juli: Well it was great to meet you earlier, have a great night!
Joe: Do you want to come over here and kill some time
Joe: I'm alone... and I'm rock hard...
Needless to say, Juli didn't respond and hopefully JGL worked it out. Only awkward thing was Juli was his ride back to the airport. Nothing was mentioned about the texts.
ANYWAYS on to show ideas
Having only hosted once before and most famously remembered for his backflip monologue hopes are high. The following are a few ideas that we can only guess and pray they come to fruition.
Monologue - He can't do a backflip this time but Mofo can sing. Let's hear a song about being in a double good movie (DNR) bad movie (premium rush) sandwich. I actually went to the midnight showing for Premium Rush, heres how it went down. 15 people there, half dressed in yuppy bike rider gear, awkwardly silent before the film starts...everyone yells at the screen when JGL skids out or gets nailed by a car. Actually better idea - JGL does the entire monologue on a fixxxy no breaks!
Douchey guitar dudes - He was so good at being a new agey singer songwriter last time I'd like to see him interact with the Mumfords, baring they can handle a small part in a skit. Here's what I have in mind ... they are 1960s folk heros at an English pub just finishing up for the night. JGL is frontman and as a tradition gets to pick from the beautiful women left in the bar.
BRUCE!!! - Get Bruce Willis to do a cameo as his dad in a skit. Doesn't even matter, just get him on the show somehow for Looper. That man is comedic gold
Real Batman - JGL snooping around in the batcave pretending to be Batman, gets caught by the real batman and shamed as Robin.
Weekend Update - JGL reports on waiting in line for an iPhone 5
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